I cant live like this?

I wont tell my name... Am tired of my painfull life. I want to forget my past cant forget it pains alot... I tried to kill my self more then 6 or 7 times. First i took insulin i thought as i am not diabitic, ill go in coma and wont remember my past pain and loss. But takin insulin just made me thin and weak then i tried suffocate my self but i came to know that it is more hard to die like that... I cut my vein but some **** people saved me. Now i injucted air filled empty injuction in my vein as i had heard it is dangerous but nothing happening.... Help me someone i cant forget cant live like this its been 6 month of trying to forget past but.... Please i need help what should i do